“Loud and proud, Molly”

To be successful as a yoga teacher and Reiki healer, I have to be seen. I mean, people need to know that I and the services I offer actually exist. That means that I cannot be invisible…even though that is all I have ever been. Honestly, I’m comfortable where no one sees me. Hidden from others’ judgement and criticism. If I never show myself, I can’t be judged…no one will ever even know I’m here. Friends, this has literally been my guiding principle! Dang! I spend a fair amount of my time trying to convince others that they need to share their light with the world—that we NEED their light—YOUR LIGHT! And what have I been actively hiding?!?! What on earth is wrong with this picture?!?! I hide behind a keyboard for hours every month editing papers (“working”). Is this my soul’s work? Heck no! Does it help pay a bill or two? Maybe. But does it simultaneously suck the life out of me? Yes, it does. Shoulders hunched, head forward, back pain, neck pain, lack of enthusiasm, etc.…

And what sets my heart on fire? Helping people heal. Helping people move their bodies and feel better. Sharing my knowledge, no matter how small or trivial it may seem, with others who don’t yet have the same knowledge.

So, starting today (but really I started a while ago and I just didn’t know it), I’m going to try to step out of my comfort zone-- to become more visible. One of my favorite teachers used to tell me, “loud and proud, Molly!” (almost like he knew that I would have preferred to be hiding under a rock.) As an adult, I’ve been able to choose life under a rock, to control where and when I’m seen, but I think it’s time to let go of my insecurities and allow my light to shine. So, next time you see me, you’ll want to have your sunglasses handy. (Okay, that’s a bit of hyperbole, but you get the idea.)

Maybe you, too, prefer to hide under a rock? If you do, I’d encourage you to find small ways to share your light with others. I have been doing this for years in my yoga classes and with the few Reiki clients who find me, almost by accident. These are the interactions that have sustained my spirit (in addition, of course, to the undying support and encouragement of my husband and kids, who’ve never given up on me, even when I give up on myself). If you’re one of the wonderful people who have found my classes or Reiki space, I want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for making me feel valued! You are a blessing! Your presence has been a gift! There was a time that I believed I could do everything on my own. Molly could be completely independent, self-reliant, I didn’t need anyone. But I have come to realize that relationships, interactions, the sharing of gifts, and the exchange of energies are absolutely critical to our ability to thrive. Thank you for being part of my community, for lending your light when mine waned. You are loved.

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Reflections of a Serial Quitter

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Energy is EVERYTHING!